The Holiday Novella Binge Begins: Matzoh and Mistletoe by Jodie Griffin

Matzoh and Mistletoe by Jodie GriffinTo ramp up the festive spirit around here, I’m going to use Naughty & Nice Lists for all my holiday novella reviews.

  • Title: Matzoh and Mistletoe
  • Author: Jodie Griffin
  • Genre(s): Contemporary, Erotica
  • Publisher: Carina Press, November 2013
  • Source: NetGalley
  • Length: 92 pages
  • Trope(s): Awakening the Innocent, Alpha Cop, Evil Abusive Ex, Sex in the Snow
  • Quick blurb: Cop/Dom helps Nice Jewish Girl learn to give blowjobs.
  • Quick review: Some really promising elements, but too much How To Be A Submissive In 100 Easy Pages
  • Grade: C

He tasted like peppermint candy canes and kissed like a bad boy.

The Nice List….

  1. Jewish heroine.
  2. Dom who fucks up and apologizes.
  3. Unrequited love. For FIVE YEARS.
  4. Cat with an underwear fetish.
  5. I had to add something here to make it an odd-numbered list. It’s an OCD thing. Don’t judge me.

The Naughty List….

Or, in Snarkese, the Official BDSM-Lite Checklist:

✔ Heroine = Sexually Inexperienced Submissive, with obligatory:

  1. Lip-Biting as Proof of Innocence;
  2. Secret Slut Lacy Panties; and
  3. Prior Traumatic Experience as Trust Barrier (with the ever-popular “flinching at casual raised arm” reveal).

✔ Hero = Uber-Dom with a penchant for infantilizing pet names (“kitten” x 95) turned on by heroine’s Sweet Innocence, with obligatory Lifestyle Lectures:

  1. Why “Red” is a Good Safeword;
  2. The Sub has All the Control. No, Really; and
  3. Even Though You Barely Know Me, Trust Me. I’m a Dom.

✔ Villain = Evil Abusive Ex, with obligatory:

  1. Threatening Phone Call; followed by
  2. Sinister Late-Night Knock on Door; followed by
  3. Storming Off in Huff after Losing Staring Contest with Uber-Dom.

So here’s what I want….

I want this story re-gendered. I want a kick-ass female cop putting the moves on a non-white teacher hero who thinks wearing silk boxers is kinky.

I suppose that’s too much to ask for. A girl can dream.

2 thoughts on “The Holiday Novella Binge Begins: Matzoh and Mistletoe by Jodie Griffin

  1. I may have reached a point where I don’t even want the gender-flipped version, although, yes. Is every story with kink about the initiation/education of one (or maybe both) partners? Bored.

    • Kelly says:

      It’s really an m/f thing – hardly any of the m/m books I’ve read have that “sweet virginal innocence” vibe that squicks me out.

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