Tag Archives: revenge

Against the Tide by Elizabeth Camden

Standard

Against the Tide by Elizabeth Camden

  • Title: Against the Tide
  • Author: Elizabeth Camden
  • Genre(s): Historical, Inspiration
  • Publisher: Bethany House, October 2012
  • Source: Publisher
  • Length: 362 pages
  • Trope(s): Enigmatic Loner Hero, Tough but Nearly Desperate Heroine, Villain With a Fatal Weakness, Kidnapping, Addiction
  • Quick blurb: Naval translator gets drawn into a former opium smuggler’s quest for redemption.
  • Quick review: Another one for the “Written JUST FOR ME” category.
  • Grade: A-

I’m always on the hunt for new and different in romance, and when it comes in the form of an inspirational historical suspense story centering on the opium trade in late 19th-century Boston – with a gorgeous cover as a bonus – I am helpless to resist.

I’ve read Against the Tide three times now, and I’ve been sitting on this review for months because I’m both enthralled and a bit conflicted. The characters are complex and memorable, and the setting and suspense had me in a full-on book trance even on the second and third reads. Only one element in the narrative bothered me enough to add a minus instead of a plus to the letter grade, but it’s one that’s central to the story.

Read the full review at Dear Author »

Book Anxiety, Part 2: Untamed by Anna Cowan

Standard

Untamed by Anna Cowan

  • Title: Untamed
  • Author: Anna Cowan
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: Penguin Books Australia, May 2013
  • Source: NetGalley
  • Length: 432 pages
  • Trope(s): Heroine Who Says the F-Word, Hero Who’s Prettier Than The Heroine, Evil Gambling Father, Tragic Pasts, Sibling/Parent Issues, Deceit & Manipulation
  • Quick blurb: A dandy in disguise changes the lives of a disgraced and debt-ridden family.
  • Quick review: Again with the Book Anxiety, but a better outcome this time.
  • Grade: C+

“I will write a book of bad ideas,” she said, pulling viciously at the buttons on her sleeve, “and the final chapter will be dedicated to this epic, gravity-defying feat of stupidity. And in a hundred years a celebrated English wordsmith will come across it and write a poetic tribute to the very bad idea that malformed in the brain of one demented duke. His work will run to eleven volumes before his vocabulary has even begun to do justice to how extremely bad this idea is.”

Oy. I need to quit whining for new and different, because more like this is going to kill me.

This is the Cross-Dressing Duke book. The author’s brilliant blog has had me captivated by her insights on the romance genre, and her tweets about research and characterization sent me to the “request” button on NetGalley within minutes of availability.

And then once again, I got my knickers in a knot by glancing — A MERE GLANCE, I TELL YOU — at glowing and scathing responses from reviewers I respect.

Based on those discussions, along with the author’s essay on the gender dynamics, I was more than a little surprised to see how little the seemingly touchy cross-dressing issue impacted this story. The Duke of Darlington is essentially just a “not very manly man” in a dress and a close shave, hiding from his peers until a scandal blows over. We learn that he’s a master of disguise in many forms, with a “cataclysmic” ability to influence the way others see and respond to him. I saw Jude’s dress-wearing not as a form of self-expression, but as a much-planned tactic in an ongoing campaign of strategic deceit and manipulation.

What makes Untamed such an antithesis to the much-bemoaned Regency fluff is the way every other character allows themselves to be deceived and manipulated. We know the duke will slowly unravel Kit’s mistrustful control of her heart. But as he draws the rest of her family into his thrall, the extended relationship dynamics take on a life of their own – with Kit (and the reader) desperately trying to make sense of it all.

However…there were a few elements that didn’t work for me, such as the random and unsustained POVs from secondary characters popping up at odd times throughout the story. At the halfway mark, we get Kit’s brother for a page or two. At some point, we get the brutish brother-in-law for a few paragraphs. And later, for some unknown and completely inexplicable reason, we get into the head of a barely-there-before ditzy squire’s daughter as she flirts her way through her first dinner party. Each time it kicked me out of my reading trance, and each time it was completely unnecessary.

What I struggled with most was the voice. I whine for a strong authorial voice, and Cowan’s knocked me flat – and it took me a while to recover enough to fully engage with the characters. The sheer abruptness of the tone worked great at establishing the angsty, edgy atmosphere, but it also left me…I don’t know…maybe “cautious” is the best word…for much of the story. Combine that with inconsistent sentence, paragraph and section breaks in the ARC I was reading, and I had a hard time getting past the writing itself and into the adventure.

However (and yes, I can totally use “however” twice and negate my own arguments because it’s my blog so just shut up about it)…like, Raybourn, Cowan took a huge risk with this story, and I’m thrilled that a major publisher is taking chances on The New & The Different. I cannot wait to read what Cowan writes for me next. Because it’s ALL FOR ME.

Backlist Binge: Sophia James

Standard

This took me longer than I thought, because I wound up doing a full re-read of one, and I had to buy and read the newest because it finished off a series.

So… Here are the highs and lows of Harlequin Historical author Sophia James, presented in chronological order (minus the anthologies). Cover images link to Goodreads.

In summary: James is on the dark and angsty edge of Harlequin Historicals — her characters are complex and conflicted, and when she stays away from rakes and pirates, her storytelling skills are memorable. But it’s hit or miss whether all the pieces and parts coalesce enough to suck me into a full-on book trance.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Fallen Angel by Sophia JamesFallen Angel (2005)

“He’s the problem, don’t you see? I can’t love him and I can’t not love him, and he won’t let me stand up any place in between.”

The happy couple….

Nicholas Pencarrow is the Duke of Westbourne. Brenna Stanhope is the mysterious young woman who saves his life and then disappears.

The set-up….

The duke relentlessly tracks down his rescuer, and when he finds her managing a London orphanage, he refuses to take no for an answer.

The conflicts….

Brenna has a Tragic Past. The duke won’t take no for an answer.

The romance….

During the first two-thirds of the book, Nicholas is a typical infatuated rake, and Brenna falls for his charms. But then for some unknown reason, he crosses the line into stalking and obsession.

The recommendation….

The hero veering off into alphahole territory derailed what could have been a really good debut.

Grade: C-

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Masquerading Mistress by Sophia JamesMasquerading Mistress (2007)

One night. All night. The clouds and the moon and the darkness rolled into one and the clenching want made her shake, made her sweat, made her say his name in the wildness of passion.

The happy couple….

Thornton Lindsay is a scarred, reclusive war hero – and also a Reluctant Duke. Caroline Anstretton is a desperate runaway who tells a London ballroom that the duke is her lover.

The set-up….

When the duke hears of Caroline’s outrageous claim, he propositions her, and naturally she accepts, gets pregnant and runs away again.

The conflicts….

Caroline has a Tragic Past, and she’s also trying to keep her younger brother away from the gaming hells. The duke is a grumpy loner who’s mistrustful of everyone.

The romance….

There’s chemistry, but unfortunately our happy couple is separated for much of the book – and when they’re finally reunited, some rather strange war-related intrigue gets the duke all mistrustful again. Fortunately, the Revealing of the Tragic Past works its usual wonders and all is forgiven.

The recommendation….

Better pacing and characterization than Fallen Angel, but the unnecessary suspense stuff relies on more than a few Very Convenient Coincidences.

Grade: C+

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Ashblane's Lady by Sophia JamesAshblane’s Lady (2007)

He was not gentle and she was glad. His lips met hers in a searing, blistering explosion of lust, weeks of wanting sandwiched between this very moment and a future stretching only into difficulty.

The happy couple….

Alexander Ullyot is a Scottish warlord. Lady Madeleine, aka The Black Widow, is his enemy’s sister.

The set-up….

He takes her hostage. She’s tall and has fiery red hair. You do the math.

The conflicts….

See “set-up” above.

The romance….

It’s all about the fiery red hair. And the witchcraft thing.

The recommendation….

Despite the snarkage, this isn’t bad — just an enjoyable Highland romance with a bit of light magic thrown in.

Grade: B-

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

High Seas to High Society by Sophia JamesHigh Seas to High Society (2007)

The Wellinghams, Book 1

She was cold and he warmed her. She was hot and he cooled her. He was of her and she was of him and there seemed no place that they were separate or solitary in the heady secrets of the flesh.

The happy couple….

Asher Wellingham is the Duke of Carisbrook. Emma Seaton is a lady — or is she???

The set-up….

He sees her swimming naked in a cove. You do the math.

The conflicts….

Pirates.

The romance….

In between all the piratical plot shenanigans, there’s some pretty good chemistry.

The recommendation….

Kind of all over the place story-wise, but I re-read it solely for the backstory of the duke’s younger brother Taris (see below).

Grade: B-

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Mistletoe Magic by Sophia JamesMistletoe Magic (2009)

A maid came in with a large unruly bunch of orange flowers and her breath was caught. ‘Is there a card?’

‘Indeed, miss, there is.’ The maid broke the envelope away from a string that kept it joined to the bouquet, speculation unhidden in the lines of her face.

‘That will be all, thank you,’ Lillian said, waiting until the door was shut before she slit open the card.

I FELT SOMETHING.

The words were in bold capitals with no name attached.

The happy couple….

Lucas Clairmont is a brawny and brawly American in London. Lillian Davenport is a near-spinster revered by the ton as “a paragon of good sense, good taste and good comportment.”

The set-up….

Lillian has a Christmas deadline to bring a man up to scratch, or she will be forced to marry the “eminently sensible, infinitely suitable,” suitor her father has chosen. Just as she’s losing hope, she overhears Lucas threaten to kill her cousin — but before she can sneak away, he makes eye contact and gives her a “licentious and untrammelled” wink.

The conflicts….

Lucas is in England to settle the affairs of his adulterous late wife, and he learns that two nieces he’s never met are now his wards. Lillian’s father is pushing her towards a “safe” husband because his own marriage was volatile and unhappy.

The romance….

The orange flowers. Ohhhhhhh, the orange flowers.

The recommendation….

Yeah, I FELT SOMETHING too. *ahem*

Grade: B+

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The Border Lord by Sophia JamesThe Border Lord (2009)

They did not speak afterwards, each locked in a silence that was their own, a thin and tenuous bond against the secrets that would divide them.

The happy couple….

Lady Grace Stanton is a political prize, but she’s less than a beauty. Lachlan Kerr is the reluctant laird of a neighboring clan.

The set-up….

Arriving a week late for the ceremony, Lachlan takes his late brother’s place as groom within an hour of meeting his plain, stammering bride.

The conflicts….

Lachlan is still bitter and deeply distrustful over the betrayals of his late wife and his late brother, and his pride flares against Grace’s unexpected stubbornness, outspokenness and sense of honor. Meanwhile, he ignores the machinations of his jealous ex-mistress, who turns the clan against the new lady of the manor by blaming Grace for every illness, injury and accident. Also, the dead brother might not be dead.

The romance….

They’re great together in the bedroom, but out in the cold, hard keep, it’s a slow buildup from resentment to grudging respect to fierce loyalty to love.

NOTE: There is a brief bit of infidelity, but nothing comes of it (heh).

The recommendation….

It’s a bit heavy with the political and family intrigue, but it’s satisfying to watch Grace become a strong and vibrant heroine.

Grade: B

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

One Unashamed Night by Sophia JamesOne Unashamed Night (2010)

The Wellinghams, Book 2

When he stretched out and groaned she felt the control of a woman with power. Feminine power, the feeling unlike any she had ever experienced.

She did not feel guilty as Frankwell had said that she must, she did not feel sullied or soiled or befouled. Nay, she felt the sheer and utter wonder of it, the bewildering rarity of rightness.

Here. With Taris Wellingham. For this one storm-snowed freezing night.

‘Thank you.’ The words slipped out without recognition as to what she had said. A beholden contentment that broke through all that she had believed of herself or all that a husband steeped in damning religion had believed. In just one touch Frankwell’s hold on the tenure of her moral pureness was gone, replaced simply by comprehension and relief.

She smiled as his fingers began to unlace her bodice and the thin lawn fell away.

The happy couple….

Taris Wellingham, once popular and outgoing, is now a virtual recluse because of his worsening blindness. Newly-widowed Beatrice-Maude Bassingstoke is moving to London to explore her hard-won independence.

The set-up….

When the public coach they’re traveling in crashes into a ditch during a blizzard, Taris and Bea wind up spending the night together (wink, wink) in a barn.

The conflicts….

Beatrice-Maude is not a beauty, and she’s recovering from the horrors of an abusive marriage. Taris is a bit touchy about his blindness – to the point of preferring that people believe he’s a stumbling drunk.

The romance….

Their titular one-night stand in the barn is soooo good, and their relationship evolves to the much-deserved happy ending in a believable and completely swoon-worthy way.

The recommendation….

Oh lordy, I love this book.

Grade: A

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

One Illicit Night by Sophia JamesOne Illicit Night (2011)

The Wellinghams, Book 3

Watching a dam break in the circle of flesh, tipping into utter need, his grip tightening in her hair as an anchor, no breath or ease or quiet exploration. Only five years of apartness and ten thousand hours of regret.

The happy couple….

Third son Cristo Wellingham is the black sheep of the family, finally returning to England after a lengthy, mysterious absence. Eleanor Westbury is the young countess of a much older earl.

The set-up….

Five years before the main action, a disguised-as-a-prostitute Eleanor attempts to deliver an all-important letter to a disguised-as-a-degenerate-but-really-a-spy Christo in the Chateau of Ill Repute where he lives, but she wakes up drugged and naked in his bed.

The conflicts….

He fled England because of some youthful wildness, and when he returns, he has to earn the trust of his estranged family. She winds up pregnant from their one-night stand and is desperate to protect their daughter and her dying husband from scandal.

The romance….

The initial not-meet-cute is more than a bit squicky, but when they’re reunited in London five years later, their attraction is palpable and affecting because they’re both too honorable to betray her kindly, protective husband.

The recommendation….

I had to do a full re-read because I couldn’t recall anything beyond the titular encounter, and it wasn’t very satisfying. This story has some serious pacing problems, with a Total Drama Moment happening much too early and resolving much too quickly. Even worse, the all-important letter that Eleanor risks her life to deliver in the proloque — involving the death of her brother at Christo’s hands — is a huge, gaping plot hole that is never addressed again.

Grade: C-

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The Dissolute Duke by Sophia JamesThe Dissolute Duke (2013)

The Wellinghams, Book 4

Lust ignited, an incendiary living torch of need burning bright, like the wick of gunpowder snaking down through his being. Unstoppable.

The happy couple….

Youngest sibling Lady Lucinda Wellingham is a careless flirt who relies on her three older brothers to rescue her from various “scrapes.” Taylen Ellesmere is an Impoverished Duke of Ill Repute with “numerous and shocking depravities” to his name.

The set-up….

Lucinda gets talked into crashing one of Ellesmere’s notorious house parties, and attempts to hide in his bedroom to escape a drunken horde. The duke, wearing nothing but spectacles, decides she’s more fun than reading Machiavelli while his houseguests debauch themselves.

The conflicts….

After a near-fatal carriage accident, amnesiac Lucinda accuses Ellesmere of ruining her. The duke gets the crap beaten out of him by her brothers, takes their bribe to marry her and then flees to America. He returns three years later to claim his bride and sire an heir, and she’s more than a little reluctant to acquiesce.

The romance….

He’s blinded by her sensuous innocence, her lady parts tingle when they touch, blah, blah, blah.

The recommendation….

Again, some serious pacing problems. But even worse, there is nothing new or different about this “ruined by a rake” story. It’s a boring, predictable Regency that only perpetuates the “historicals are dead” genre drama.

Grade: D+

More Naughty Norsemen: The Bodice-Ripping Era

Standard

For round two of our romp through Viking romance, we’ll focus on three vintage titles from the beloved old-skool era of Forced Seduction, Logic Fail and General WTFery.

I didn’t finish any of these — I dragged myself through the first half of each, but couldn’t find any reason to finish.

We’ll start with the least painful and save the vomit-worthy one for last.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Twin Passions by Miriam Minger

Twin Passions by Miriam Minger

  • Title: Twin Passions
  • Author: Miriam Minger
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: Paperjacks, November 1988 (self-pub ebook re-release 2010)
  • Source: Amazon (free promo, currently $3.99)
  • Length: 309 pages
  • Trope(s): Vikings
  • Quick blurb: Kidnapped by Vikings! Twin-Switching!
  • Quick review: A great start completely derailed by a ginormous Logic Fail at the halfway point.
  • Grade: DNF

Their melded bodies, bathed in a fine sheen of perspiration, were one in a wild dance of passion, swirling ever upward on a wave of rapture so intense that Gwendolyn thought she would surely die from the surging sensations.

Oh, I had such high hopes for this one. Because, really, with an original cover featuring lookalikes of pre-makeover Melanie Griffith in Working Girl and that chick from Crocodile Dundee and a random fake-tan Dynasty-type dude, in costumes from a period in history that never existed, how could this NOT be a winner?

Twin Passions by Miriam Minger - original 1988 cover

BOUND BY VIRTUE, HOSTAGE TO LOVE

Alas, it was not meant to be. I was fully engaged with this one right up until The Deflowering, in which the sight of boobs renders the hero so stupid that he doesn’t even notice that he’s bedding a different woman, who used to be a man.

kill-the-wabbit

Kinda like this. But not really.

He also fails to notice the whip marks from a flogging with a studded lash that he himself inflicted hours earlier. WTFery, indeed.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Viking! by Connie Mason

Viking! by Connie Mason

  • Title: Viking!
  • Author: Connie Mason
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: Leisure Books, July 1998 (self-pub ebook re-release 2012)
  • Source: Amazon ($3.99)
  • Length: 309 pages
  • Trope(s): Vikings
  • Quick blurb: Kidnapped by Vikings! Accusations of Witchcraft! Fake Marriage! Or Maybe It’s Real!?!
  • Quick review: The hero’s name is Thorne the Relentless. His sword is named Blood-drinker.
  • Grade: DNF

“The vital element missing in my dreams was the pleasure of piercing your sweet flesh with my mighty sword.”

Yes, I paid actual money for this. Shut up.

It wasn’t painful, but there wasn’t enough purple prose to make it worthwhile. I’ll let the rest of the quotes demonstrate the necessity of the DNF….

View the story “Viking! by Connie Mason” on Storify

…but let’s take a closer look at the original cover, shall we?

Viking! by Connie Mason

I’m guessing the publisher charged extra for the embossed golden V pointing directly at his throbbing manhood.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Educational Visual Interlude

To prepare for the Shriveling of the Brain Cells (see below), let us examine the intricacies of Norse mythology:

_viking_dance

The mysterious “Let’s Get High Before We
Sacrifice A Goat To Thor” Dance of the Merry Vikings

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Fires of Winter by Johanna Lindsey

Fires of Winter by Johanna Lindsey

  • Title: Fires of Winter
  • Author: Johanna Lindsey
  • Series: Haardrad Viking Family, Book 1
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: Avon, September 1980 (self-pub ebook re-release 2010)
  • Source: Amazon (currently $1.99)
  • Length: 309 pages
  • Trope(s): Vikings
  • Quick blurb: Kidnapped by Vikings! Forced Seduction! Heroine Who Dresses Like A Boy!
  • Quick review: If I had finished this, it would have been an F-minus. It was DREADFUL.
  • Grade: DNF

That proud beast would surely tear her asunder and render her screaming for mercy.

When I started live-tweeting this, more than a few people claimed this book as their first adult romance. It’s a damn good thing I didn’t read this in 1980, because I would have been SCARRED FOR LIFE.

View the story “Fires of Winter by Johanna Lindsey” on Storify

I knew going in that this book is one of the infamous “forced seduction” romances. The opening chapter made a joke of rape, and The Deflowering scene is now burned in my memory as one of the most ridiculous things I have ever read. It might have worked as a parody, but the attempted humor was painfully uncomfortable.

By that point in the book, the Cringe Factor was already in a death spiral, primarily because of the TSTL female lead, who is now burned in my memory as the WORST “HEROINE” EVER. She would be the cause of the “doing unspeakable things to my Kindle” thing I mentioned in a previous post.

Fires of Winter by Johanna Lindsey - original 1980 cover

The original cover is the ONLY
good thing about this book.

And the writing. Uff da. Oy. UGH. I have a few others by Lindsey buried deep in the TBR queue, and I’m heartened by the fact that Fires of Winter was one of her earliest works. Honestly, without that knowledge, I would never read anything of hers again.

My Kindle notes include gems like these:

(1) Tigers aren’t venomous.

(2) There were no turkeys in medieval Norway.

(3) Ravens don’t wear cloaks.

And the heroine’s eyes. MY GOD, PEOPLE, SHE HAS GREY EYES! Not just ordinary grey eyes. These are stormy, cold, steely, silver, stormy, icy, evil, curious, flashing, wild, stormy, brooding, cunning, stormy  (did I mention STORMY???) grey eyes that glare, glance, shoot daggers, menace, narrow, darken, squint, accuse, disbelieve, pierce, sting, defy, baffle, sparkle, dart, ignite, glow, smolder and rage.

And the so-called “hero” doesn’t even name his sword. What kind of Viking doesn’t name his sword???

wabbit3

♫ ”My spear and magic helmet…” ♫

There’s more — much more — to snark about, but it’s not worth the effort. There was NOTHING to redeem this book, and it’s going to take some SERIOUS loin-girding to get me to try another by Johanna Lindsey.

Naughty Norsemen: Going a-Viking in Romancelandia – Part 1

Standard

We’ll subtitle this post….

The maiden voyage

As part of my Haul of Half-Off Harlequins, I wound up with two Viking romances, chosen primarily for the snark value. Unfortunately, both were actually pretty good.

But, of course, these books kicked off a Viking-theme book binge, which dredged up one ridiculously fun PNR mashup, several “meh” examples, and one so-called “classic” that left me cringing.

Cute Viking

Before we set sail, I must admit I know fuck-all about actual Vikings or Norse mythology. I did learn that the proper homage to Thor for a successful pillage was a goat sacrifice, and you know how I feel about goats.

ANYWAY, it’s time to put on our pointy-horned hats and go raiding.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Warriors in Winter by Michelle Willingham

Warriors in Winter by Michelle Willingham

  • Title: Warriors in Winter
  • Author: Michelle Willingham
  • Series/Category: MacEagan Brothers, Book 7 (Harlequin Historical)
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: Harlequin, December 2012
  • Source: Harlequin.com ($4.79 ebook)
  • Length: 288 pages
  • Trope(s): Vikings
  • Quick blurb: Vikings! Revenge! Blindness! Plot Moppets! Sacrifice!
  • Quick review: Almost forgettable, but I liked the focus on the strong heroines.
  • Grade: B-

“You must choose, Brianna. Between vengeance and death…or marriage and life.”

This was a good choice for my maiden voyage into Viking romance — short and enjoyable fluff, with heroines that didn’t make me want to do unspeakable things to my Kindle.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Ice Maiden by Debra Lee Brown

Ice Maiden by Debra Lee Brown

  • Title: Ice Maiden
  • Author: Debra Lee Brown
  • Series/Category: Harlequin Historical
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: Harlequin, Febuary 2001
  • Source: Harlequin.com ($4.79 ebook)
  • Length: 304 pages
  • Trope(s): Vikings! Shipwrecks! Kidnappings! Big Misunderstandings!
  • Quick blurb: Shipwrecked Scottish chieftain is forced to marry Viking princess so she can obtain her dowry to ransom her brother.
  • Quick review: An interesting trope-twister with the hero being held captive by a tall, muscular, grumpy heroine.
  • Grade: B-

Frigid. Authoritative. Mercenary. All a man could want in a bride.

I appreciated the kickass heroine and the gender reversal of the plot much more after reaching the next stops on the Viking Voyage (more on that dreck coming soon….).

One-Quote Review: Unrivaled by Siri Mitchell

Standard
  • Unrivaled by Siri MitchellTitle: Unrivaled
  • Author: Siri Mitchell
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Inspirational, Historical (1910 U.S.)
  • Publisher: Bethany House, March 2013
  • Source: NetGalley ($9.99 ebook)
  • Length: 384 pages
  • Trope(s): Family Drama, Reluctant Debutante, Reluctant Heir
  • Quick blurb:  St. Louis debutante tries desperately to save her ailing father’s beloved candy company, but struggles with her feelings for their rival’s son.
  • Quick review: Fun historical premise and setting, memorable characters and complex conflicts — but not my favorite by Mitchell
  • Grade: B

“I’ve always thought a meringue is a thing like hope, buoyed as they they are plenty of hot air. A bit pretentious at the start, don’t you think?” He settled his hands on his chest. “But that let that hope wait, let that resolve harden for a while…. Leave the oven door closed, and something wonderful happens. You just have to be willing to wait for it.”

I’d recommend this book for the historical world-building alone. Mitchell combines the early 1900s time period with the drama of rival family businesses to create a unique atmosphere that’s light-hearted and restless and constantly evolving — just like her main characters.

The one thing this book was lacking was a cohesive faith message. I love the low-key and understated spirituality in all of Mitchell’s books, but concentrating all of it in one secondary character — especially one who talks in circles — made it seem like an afterthought instead of an integral part of the story.

Lady Outlaw by Stacy Henrie

Standard

Lady Outlaw by Stacy Henrie (Harlequin)

  • Title: Lady Outlaw
  • Author: Stacy Henrie
  • Series/Category: Love Inspired Historical
  • Genre(s): Historical (Western), Inspirational
  • Publisher: Harlequin, September 2012
  • Source: Amazon ($3.82 ebook)
  • Length: 288 pages
  • Trope(s): Cowgirl in Peril, Beta Hero with Tragic Past, Evil Banker, Bad Guys in Salooons
  • Quick blurb: Desperate rancheress rethinks her dangerous ways of acquiring money when she hires an ex-bounty hunter with a tragic past as her new cowhand.
  • Quick review: Good — but recommended only for dedicated inspie readers.
  • Grade: B-

“Is that what this is about? Making sacrifices?” He leaned forward. “A sacrifice is only worth something if it’s right. Sacrificing your integrity, your happiness, your freedom — that won’t bring you anything but misery. I know, because I tried.”

A strong-but-vulnerable heroine, an honorable beta hero with a believable tragic past, and a great set-up for the spot-on faith messages. But compared to my last read, Henrie’s storytelling and voice sagged. This was her debut novel, and I’d be willing to try her second.

The Rake’s Redemption by Regina Scott

Standard

The Rake's Redemption by Regina Scott

  • Title: The Rake’s Redemption
  • Author: Regina Scott
  • Series/Category: Everard Legacy, Book 3 (Love Inspired Historical)
  • Genre(s): Historical (Regency), Inspirational, Suspense
  • Publisher: Harlequin, November 2012
  • Source: NetGalley ($3.82 ebook)
  • Length: 288 pages
  • Trope(s): Annoyingly Perky Heroine, Angsty Emo Hero, Insta-Love, Mistorical, Purple Prose
  • Quick blurb: Marquess’s daughter decides a dueling poet is the perfect man to acquire her father’s title.
  • Quick review: This wasn’t working for me as a historical, as a suspense, as an inspirational OR as a romance.
  • Grade: DNF

It started with the Regency heroine asking an uknown man to dance at a ball. Then we get this:

…she’d wondered whether she’d finally found the suitor she’d been praying for — someone who could help her protect the family name, as her father’s only living child.

And then, during an actual prayer, it got worse.

“Show me the man You mean to help me gain approval to carry on the title of Marquess of Widmore!”

So, yeah. It was like that.

Medieval Mania: More Barbara Samuel

Standard

I just HAD to use the original bodice-ripper covers for these….

A Winter Ballad by Barbara Samuel

  • Title: A Winter Ballad
  • Author: Barbara Samuel
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: HarperCollins, October 1994; self-published, October 2010
  • Source: Amazon, 99¢ promo ($2.99 ebook)
  • Length: 352 pages
  • Trope(s): Knight, Damsel in Distress, Revenge, Evil Sibling, Angst, Tragic Past,
  • Quick blurb: Knight on revenge mission tempted to forego his royal mandate to stay with the woman who saved his life.
  • Quick review: Basically a stripped-down, but oh-so-romantic, version of Pillars of Earth
  • Grade: B+

When he made to draw away, Anya caught his hand below the table. “You did not find me whole,” she said, “and could not leave me less.”

Dying knight, spiritually broken heroine, godless priests, evil and/or missing siblings, curses, plagues, assassination plots…. And smooching. Some really, really good smooching.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Heart of a Knight by Barbara Samuel

  • Title: Heart of a Knight
  • Author: Barbara Samuel
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Historical
  • Publisher: HarperCollins, August 1997; self-published, October 2010
  • Source: Amazon, 99¢
  • Length: 368 pages
  • Trope(s): Gentle Giant, Damsel in Distress, In Disguise
  • Quick blurb: An errant knight mysteriously appears to help a beleaguered noblewoman save her castle
  • Quick review: More of a predictable fairy tale than Bed of Spices, but definitely worth reading
  • Grade: B

Better, she said, to remember it was with women that true power lay. A power quiet and subtle, to be sure, but never to be ignored.

The enigmatic hero is the main focus of the story, but Elizabeth is a really strong and compelling character. No TSTL or doormat heroines in Barbara Samuel’s medieval world, THANK GOD.

Veil of Pearls by MaryLu Tyndall

Standard

Veil of Pearls by MaryLu Tyndall

  • Title: Veil of Pearls
  • Author: MaryLu Tyndall
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Inspirational, Historical (American)
  • Publisher: Barbour Books, July 2012
  • Source: Provided by the publisher via NetGalley ($9.26 ebook)
  • Length: 312 pages
  • Trope(s): In Disguise, Angst, Star-Crossed Lovers, Revenge, Mistorical
  • Quick blurb: Light-skinned former slave finds love with plantation playboy in 1811 Charleston.
  • Quick review: Great title, gorgeous cover, promising setting, very disappointing story.
  • Grade: DNF

Each step she took toward freedom loosened the fetters enslaving her soul until they began to slip away, one by one.

Oh, fudge. I really really really wanted to love this – an intriguing premise, a pre-Civil War Southern setting and scads of five-star reviews. Unfortunately, I only made it about a third of the way through. The anachronisms and the logic issues and the sermonizing and the awkward mix of purple prose and clichés were just too distracting to ignore.

As usual, I feel guilty for DNFing an inspirational, because the Road to Hell is paved with Bricks of Sarcasm.

And…now I feel guilty for snarking about going to Hell. And now I’m freaking out because the irony of the guilt doubling in on itself might spawn a ginormous spiritual wormhole or something. Which I really hope doesn’t happen, because wormholes usually have some sort of space/time continuum weirdness, and time travel stuff really confuses me. I need to stop watching Doctor Who. This is the way my brain works, in case you were wondering whether I really need that Zoloft prescription.

Speaking of time travel….

The Mistoricals

Let’s get this big one out of the way first. Nearly every review of Tyndall’s 14 books mentions her attention to historical accuracy, so I wasn’t expecting to find this in Chapter 2:

Morgan circled one of the Victorian stuffed chairs in front of the hearth….

Yes, VICTORIAN. In 1811 South Carolina. I lost my trust in the author right there.  I was reading an ARC, so I downloaded the Kindle sample of the published book to double-check, but the sample wasn’t quite long enough to include this scene. I really hope that someone noticed and fixed it, but that kind of error should NEVER have even made it that far.

We later meet a minor character named Lord Demming. No, he’s not a British peer taking a vacation from the House of Lords.

“He is the speaker of the General Assembly and a descendant of the Earl of Demming.” Though Morgan had heard he was the younger son of the late earl and therefore had no right to the title “lord.” But such things were tolerated in America.”

Wait just a gosh-darn minute (please note I’m restraining myself because this is an inspirational). Fake British titles were tolerated in early American political leaders? I’m no historian, but I seriously doubt…. Oh, never mind. It’s not worth the effort because there was really no reason to include that bit of irrelevant characterization.

But maybe Charleston was the last bastion of Loyalist sympathy, because there’s this:

Had she even had a coming out? Being a commoner, most likely not.

Yes, COMMONER. In 1811 South Carolina. Again, not necessary at all.

There were several other jarring words and phrases that irked me: Don Juan, city council, landlubber, hair the color of alabaster, besotted (as a synonym for drunk), pampered urchins and coddled urchins (to describe the idle rich), witch doctor…. And that was just the first third of the book.

Authors: PLEASE remember Kelly’s Golden Rule of Writing (And Also Life In General Because It’s An All-Purpose Sort of Rule):

Just because you CAN doesn’t mean you SHOULD.

It might be historically plausible, but that doesn’t mean it’s not awkward and distracting.

Also: Readers do not need to be reminded 27 times that your heroine has ebony curls. Disguising the luxuriant tresses as “trickles of obsidian” isn’t fooling anyone.

Leaps of Logic and Very Convenient Coincidences

We meet our enslaved heroine Althea as she escapes a brutal Barbados plantation. She walks hours – still in leg shackles – through a jungle to the nearest port. Because she’s only one-quarter Negro, she’s light-skinned enough to pass for white. She instantly finds a Charleston-bound ship, conveniently captained by an abolitionist, paying for her passage with money she somehow earned during her years of slavery.

The captain informs her he’ll waive his “women on board are bad luck” rule but he won’t feed her. We are given no indication of how she survives the week-long journey without food. We aren’t shown – or even told – how a beautiful young woman traveling alone is able to reach her destination completely unmolested.

You might think this was a Harlequin Intrigue. But you’d be wrong.

One month later, our heroine – now known as Adalia – is safely ensconced in a Catholic church in Charleston, sleeping on a spare cot in exchange for volunteering her healing skills to treat slaves. She worries that her luck is about to run out:

She’d not eaten since yesterday when the last of her money had run out. Of course, she still had her mother’s pearls, but she’d rather die than sell the last remnant of her family – a symbol of the love she’d known before slavery.

She was somehow able to hide a pearl necklace from her ABUSIVE SLAVE OWNER for SEVEN YEARS. And I still can’t figure out how she managed to save the necklace in the first place.

…the hurricane swept them out to sea, leaving Adalia and Delphia orphans. Two days later, Sir Walter visited their farm on the pretense of checking on his neighbors. With soft words and promises of care, he stole them, frightened and hungry, from their beds.

Where could she have possibly hidden the necklace as she was being stolen from her bed?

I almost quit reading right there. I probably should have.

OH! ALMOST FORGOT! The necklace is made of black pearls. I’m not kidding. Check the cover. Subtle, huh?

Where were we?

Ah yes – the starving waif clutching her pearls. But never fear! A local doctor appears at the church (it’s A Miracle because she had just prayed for it!) and offers our heroine a position as his assistant, with free room and board at his home.

Other penniless orphaned beauties might be concerned at such an offer, but our heroine is the trusting sort:

Relief loosened the tight coils in her chest. A man who read his Bible was surely a good man.

Because everyone who reads the Bible is a saint. (That was sarcasm, a literary technique used by bona fide saints. For realz. I looked it up.)

Historical world-building gone wrong

On her very first foray to a plantation, Althea/Adalia literally knocks our hero off a bridge into a creek. But first she calls him a “swaggering, vainglorious despot.”

You might be wondering how a slave acquired such erudition. You’ll recall she wasn’t born a slave; we’re told that although her parents were poor farmers, they educated their daughters in mathematics, literature, history, science, Latin, and religion. Althea/Adalia must have been a been child prodigy to learn all that by age 12.

“You do not own me, sir, as you do the poor souls who work your land. Therefore, you cannot insist I do anything.” She couldn’t believe how wonderful the defiant words felt on her lips. How glorious! How empowering!

Yes, EMPOWERING. I fully expected to see “synergy” and “leverage” and “calendarize” in the next chapter.

But wait – there’s more! A few pages later, our heroine observes our charming hero thusly:

His face no longer held that look of abject boredom so often found on the spawn of the tediously affluent.

Here’s another one:

“You overbearing, self-gratifying” – she growled, attempting to control her tongue. Her attempt failed – “presumptuous vain, pampered milksop.”

Not done yet….

“I don’t hate you sir. I merely know your kind.”

“And what kind is that?”

She stopped and eyed him. The social season had begun in Charleston, and much like the season in London, it was a time when the affluent and powerful forsook their plantations to converge on the city for balls, plays, concerts, and general frivolous amusements. That was all she was to him – an amusement.

“The kind who have more wealth than they can ever spend, who fritter away their time in idle and often immoral amusements, and who think they are better than everyone else simply by nature of their birth and fortune.”

The heroine was raised on a small farm in Barbados. She was forced into slavery at age 12.

I keep repeating these important points, but it seems like I’m the only one standing up and yelling “How in the HECK (this is an inspie, so no h-e-double-hockey-sticks allowed) would she know what the London social season is like? SHE WAS A SLAVE, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.”

But then, just a page or two later, she turns into a simpering idiot:

With wide eyes and open mouth, she was like a child seeing the world for the first time.

So is she a worldly sophisticate or is she a childlike simpleton? I cannot get invested in any character – much less the main character – whose thoughts, words and actions are so completely at odds with the given backstory. That kind of inconsistency ruins the world-building for me every time.

The heavy-handed preachifying

As a general rule, I prefer subtlety and understatement in my casual reading. I don’t need to be beaten over the head with THEMES and MESSAGES and LESSONS. For example:

Morgan glanced at the slaves, their bare backs leveled to the sun. Lud, this woman challenged him like no other! Why had he not considered the right or wrong of forcing others to work against their will, of keeping them imprisoned on the plantation like animals?

When I read passages like that, I get the feeling that the author thinks (a) readers are stupid OR (b) doesn’t trust her own writing to get the message across. Sometimes both.

Too many inspie authors fall into the trap of telling instead of showing – but pulpit-pounding is never a good storytelling technique.

Perhaps that was why God had brought them together – the most ill-suited, unlikely couple in Charleston! For Adalia to open Morgan’s eyes to the horrors of slavery and perhaps change the opinions of the next generation. Or maybe even to bring Morgan closer to God. He certainly needed a relationship with the Almighty. If she could achieve the latter, God would certainly convince him of the former.

I don’t need to be told this. I had already figured out all on my own that Adalia is the Perfect Christian who is Licensed to Judge because God Is Her BFF. I avoid people like that in real life, and I don’t find those traits are inspiring in any way.