Oh Dear God: Red Knight Rising by Alex Ironrod

An Open Letter to MLR Press:

Red Knight Rising by Alex Ironrod

Dear MLR Press:

(A) I will pay NINE DOLLARS for this only if you PROMISE to use my profits to hire someone who knows how to use use Photoshop. That is one of the WORST covers I have seen in a long time. I’d blame it on the designer, but I think the real punishment should be administered to the editor who approved that freakish mess of crap.

(B) Alex Ironrod. Ironrod. Alex IRONROD. Really? Are you trying to insult us?

Then again, after reading the blurb and the excerpt, maybe you are.

Good luck with that.

Thanks but no thanks,

Kelly


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Spice and Smoke by Suleikha Snyder

  • Spice and Smoke by Suleikha SynderTitle: Spice and Smoke
  • Author: Suleikha Snyder
  • Series: N/A
  • Genre(s): Contemporary, M/M, Erotica (?)
  • Publisher: Samhain, April 2012
  • Purchase: Amazon, $2.66
  • Tropes: Star-Crossed Lovers
  • Quick blurb: Bollywood celebrities reluctantly star in their own personal soap opera.
  • Quick review: Bollywood + angst + humor + HEA + great writing = I want MORE
  • Grade: A

Longer review coming soon, but for now… Wow. I need to read it again with a more critical eye, but I definitely *need* to read it again.

When the cameras stop rolling, the real scene begins.

To their adoring public, Avi Kumar and Trishna Chaudhury are Bollywood’s sweethearts. Behind closed doors, their open marriage lets them freely indulge in all manner of forbidden passions. The arrangement suits them both, but as they begin filming on the set of their new movie, the heat of new and rekindled flames singes the pages of what they thought would be a fresh script.

When costars Michael Gill and Harsh Mathur arrive on set, the sexual temperature goes up exponentially—at least for Trish. She can’t take her eyes of Harsh, for whom she’s carried a torch for years. Avi’s instant attraction to Michael, however, bounces off Michael’s solid wall of resistance.

Meanwhile, ex-boyfriends Vikram Malhotra and Sam Khanna, cast as fictional enemies, are finding it harder and harder to control the very real demons that once cost them the love of a lifetime.

Once the music starts, though, they all have no choice but to dance . And pray the fallout doesn’t ruin all their careers…and destroy their love.

Bollywood + Sexy Times + Gratuitous Musical = Kelly Hands Over Her Debit Card.

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Hot on Her Trail by Sable Hunter

  • Title: Hot on Her TrailHot on Her Trail by Sable Hunter
  • Author: Sable Hunter
  • Series: Book 2 in the Hell Yeah! series
  • Genre(s): Contemporary, Erotica
  • Publisher: Self-Published, February 2011
  • Purchase: Amazon, free in Kindle Lending Library (regular $4.99)
  • Tropes: Insta-Love, Virgin Heroine, Cowboy Alpha Male, Serial Killer, Magical Orgasm Cure, TSTL
  • Quick blurb: Homeless orphaned dyslexic pregnant virgin hides out in baby daddy’s barn to escape her bipolar stalker/serial killer.
  • Quick snark: A return to Tebow Ranch, where the women are childlike virgins and the men are misogynistic fuckwads.
  • Grade: F

Soooo, after laughing my way through the first book of this series, I strapped on my big-girl undies for Book 2:

Jacob McCoy wishes for a wife and a family. Tis the Season for miracles when a young woman shows up on his doorstep: homeless, in danger and expecting a child – Jacob’s child.

Their relationship is complicated by the fact that, A – they’ve never met before and B – she’s a virgin. Jessie is determined not to be a burden to the McCoy family. As far as she’s concerned, she is just passing through. Jacob has a different opinion – he wants Jessie in his life, in his bed and in his heart.

It’s a good thing I suited up in protective gear, because in between the vomit-inducing Insta-Love and some serious WTFery, this book PISSED ME OFF. Therefore, I am subtitling this review:

A Return To Tebow Ranch: Where The Women Are Childlike Virgins And The Men Are Misogynistic Fuckwads.

This is going to take a while, so fasten your seatbelts – it’s going to be a long and wild ride. Like getting your bra strap caught on the fake horns of a mechanical bull and you can’t get off until someone takes pity on you and unplugs the damn thing.

Warning: If you don’t like spoilers or dirty words, go elsewhere. You know, in case that “fuckwads” thing wasn’t a big enough hint.

Read the rest of the review at DearAuthor.com